Extra! Extra! Read all about it!

The Story:

Recently, a columnist with the St. Louis Post Dispatch published an article about the search for my biological family. The story, smack-dab on the front page of the newspaper’s Community section, was primarily about my search and how he and I came to meet one another. Interestingly, his article came at a time when the Illinois legislature passed a new law requiring “the state to provide basic medical information and an accurate birth certificate to adoptees…” (clarification: the photo next to the article headline in the image to the left is of the columnist, Tony Messenger)

That’s how my search began. I needed to know about my biological family’s health background. Unfortunately, the state of Missouri still requires a court order to open those records. Luckily, I didn’t end up having to take that route. Instead, my adoptive uncle was able to track down my biological aunt via his family connections.  

When I woke up the Sunday that the article was published, I decided to read the web-based version first. Afterward, I ventured out to the local market and purchased five hard copies of the newspaper. I stood at the publication racks and flipped through the massive paper searching for the community section. I yanked it out, and got my first glimpse of the article on the front page.

When I arrived home from the store, I proceeded to package and mail copies of the article to some of my family members. Throughout that day, I received a few phone calls and text messages. All were very congratulatory!

Here’s a link to the article at www.stltoday.com.

The Emotions:

There’s no doubt that I felt quite accomplished when I read Tony’s column. My story had finally achieved some more recognition. My attempts to get the article published were not all for selfless reasons. Indeed, I wanted my blog to receive more local exposure. This, in turn, would hopefully provide me with a larger list of subscribers. I certainly wanted the conversation about child adoption to spread, and I knew that breaking that barrier would help others.

The selfish reasons weren’t sinister, though. I simply wanted my story, and the stories of my family, to be heard by a larger audience. I felt that the stories were historically interesting and emotionally charged. I have no interest in splashing my family’s secrets all over the web and other media. I just knew that people would eat that stuff up like an orphaned child at dinnertime.

My overall satisfaction came from knowing that all of that had happened because I made the effort. I wanted more exposure for my story and the institution of child adoption, and I helped make it happen. My goal was accomplished, and now I’m moving onto the next. Will my family’s story make it onto the NYT’s Bestseller list, or will someone write a screenplay? I suppose there might be a chance if I continue to spark the conversation.

Besides all of that, reading a news article about oneself is certainly strange. I was anxious to see how I was quoted, and whether the story was presented accurately. Overall, I was very satisfied with Tony’s column, and I’ve let him know.

The Advice:

Once again, my advice focuses on making more people aware of child adoption. I have found that the best way to do that is to talk about something I know. Well, I certainly know about my own personal experiences with adoption, and I can’t think of a better source for material.

Like I stated previously, I’ve been writing about my adoption for different reasons. The point is that anyone with the interest in telling their story can help to spark more conversation on the subject. It has been a strange trip for me, but I’m taking it all in day by day.

If you don’t like the idea of placing details of your family’s history on the web, then don’t. I’m always worrying about that, but I’ve done my best to write detailed accounts while limiting the amount of embarrassing or inappropriate material. So, I would suggest everyone else do the same with their stories. Either way, telling your story should be an enlightening and valuable experience.

So, do you think it’s wise to write about your personal situations on the web where all can see? Is it more reasonable if those personal stories are meant to help and inform others? If you have any thoughts, please feel free to leave a comment.

- Andrew

Seeking My Medical History

The Story:
Skipping ahead in my story a few years, I finally decided to begin the search for my biological family’s medical history on October 5, 2009. I spent a few nights searching the web site of the Missouri Department of Social Services¹. I was able to download some forms from the State's Adoption Information Registry² that I could use to potentially secure that information. Come to find out, though, this process wouldn’t necessarily gain me access to medical histories. It would, however, make my contact information available to those biological family members who were interested in finding me, if any.

My reason for finally beginning my search for medical information was very simple. I was tired of having to explain to my doctors that I had no knowledge of my family’s medical background. I figured that males and females of all ages die everyday from undiagnosed hereditary health issues. The fact of the matter was that I needed to know what I was up against.

So, I printed the forms from the DSS’s web site, and filled them out with as much information as I could. The rest, however, would be left up to my adoptive parents. According to the Missouri DSS’s web site, adult adoptees that were adopted prior to August 13, 1986 must provide the written consent of their adoptive parent(s). After finalizing everything on my end, I packaged up the documents and mailed them to my Dad.

Sources:

¹Missouri Department of Social Services http://www.dss.mo.gov/cd/adopt/

²Adoption Information Registry http://www.dss.mo.gov/cd/adopt/adoir.htm

The Emotions:

I was a bit concerned with what I might be getting myself into by sending in the application to the Missouri DSS. All I wanted was a medical history, but the potential for gaining identifying information about my biological family was a little nerve-racking. At that point, I hadn’t really prepared myself for such a situation. It may seem to be of no consequence to some, but being able to provide a medical doctor with my medical background is pretty important in diagnosing potential health issues. I was very concerned that there may well have been a ticking time bomb just waiting to explode! 

The Advice:

Since the decision to begin a search for biological medical information is up to the adoptee, I don’t believe that I have too much advice here for the adopters. However, all adoptive guardians ought to encourage adoptees to begin this search, and I think that it is in the best interests of all adoptees to take this initial step themselves. The advantages, more than likely, will outweigh any disadvantages.

I’m pretty much the typical man when it comes to visiting a doctor. I balk at the idea! Fortunately, as I have grown older, my outlook on such things has changed for the better. There doesn’t seem to be a perfect time to begin this search, but there is the best time. That would be as soon as humanly possible. The sooner you know the better.

- Andrew